This can be a difficult time of year for many people. The pressure to be happy and be seen to having the best time is just so high, that if you’re not feeling it, well it can be really hard in these short, dark days of winter.

Sunday 22 December was the 8th anniversary of the death by suicide of my youngest sister Rachel. She was 45 and I can’t help wondering whether she was perimenopausal and if that had a role to play. Almost 50% of menopausal women say they feel depressed, so it’s very common.

This time of year always makes me reflect on Rachel’s life and death and makes you realise that you can never really know what is going on with someone. Bad things do happen in life and it really is ok not to feel ok, especially at Christmas.

Whilst there’s a lot you can do to lift your mood, I know from my own experience of depression that when you don’t even think it’s worth getting out of bed, it’s can be hard to motivate yourself to do anything.

However, wanting to end on a more positive note, here are a few dos and don'ts for supporting anyone around you that’s feeling low.

😎 Do be there for them [don't avoid them because you feel awkward!]

😎 Do listen to what they have to say if they want to talk.

😎 Silence is fine as is saying ‘Not sure what to say, but I'm here if there is anything I can do.'

😎 Do tell them how much you value your relationship with them.

😎 Do encourage them to eat, ideally nutrition dense protein, vegetables and healthy fats really do impact mood.

😎 Don't forget that sugar & UPF makes everything worse including mood.

😎 Don't forget that alcohol is a depressant and is not helpful [especially in excess].

😎 Do get outside in daylight and expose your eyes to the light, even on dark, wet, cold days.

😎 Do move, walk, exercise, cold water swim – the endocannabinoids and extra oxygen are mood boosters.

😎 Do watch something funny on TV that makes you laugh – do not watch the news, especially at night.

😎 Don't tell them to get a grip and point out that there are many people worse off than them.

😎 Do test your/their vitamin D level and supplement accordingly. The lower your vitamin D the worse your mood.

Vitamin D is vital for your brain and mental health and encourages the conversion of tryptophan into serotonin – the ‘happy’ hormone.

Whatever the mood, I wish you a happy, peaceful, restful and above all a healthy Christmas, whatever plans you have or don’t have.

Love
Helen